I can't write storys anymore, I have not had a feeding muse for many years and I can start stories, but they never finish and they never get published anymore.
I'm struggling with isolation and lonelyness, especially on Feabie no woman wants to talk to me. I assume it is age discrimination or something else, maybe I'm not handsome enough. I miss the time when I could live this out in real life and where people cared to talk to me and loved my hot feeding fantasies.
The lonelyness is fueling depression and destroying my creative spark to write fucked up hot feeding stories. My stories now lack all humanity, because I'm missing this in real life too.
I'm scared and worried that this was it, this was my life, that it will end soon. I have horrible nightmares every night reminding me how dead my life has become and that there is nobody in the world that cares about me anymore, not really, not in a real human sense. I have such big dream still, but being so alone is horrible, it saps all my energy. Having lost all my family is terrible, I'm a family person at heart, with nobody left in the world.
All I get right now are superficial interactions with people via messengers and in text, I miss people in person, real people that you can talk to.
Hoping for better times, when I can write again, where I'm around close friends again.